A Sorceress Comes to Call
by T. Kingfisher
“We’ve all heard about evil stepmothers, but what about unhinged evil sorceress birth mothers? ”
Meter Ratings
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Meter Ratings 〰️
Cozy Meter: 2/5
Spicy Meter: 0/5
Epic Meter: 3/5
Ew Meter: 3/5
Re-Readability Meter: 4/5
Feelings Meter: 4/5
Overall Book Vibes:
Good
Trigger Warnings:
Mental abuse, emotional abuse, animal death, murder, gore
Summary
〰️
Summary 〰️
We’ve all heard about evil stepmothers, but what about unhinged evil sorceress birth mothers?
Cordelia is a fourteen year old girl whose experiences in childhood could keep a therapist in business for an entire lifetime. She has always known her mother, Evangeline, was a bit different. First, there are the rules in their house (like no doors allowed to be closed ever.) Then, there’s the fact that Cordelia is discouraged from making any friends other than a horse. But perhaps the most telling sign is that her mother is able to ‘make her obedient’ – aka control her body’s every movement for hours, or even days, at a time.
Cordelia’s only respite from the hell that is her mother is daily rides on her mother’s horse. Very sus.
When Evangeline announces they need to join a family affluent enough to get Cordelia married to a rich man, the poor girl finds herself whisked off to live in the manor of a well-to-do Squire and his much smarter middle-aged sister, Hester.
Hester immediately intuits that there’s something not right with Evangeline, especially after witnessing how quietly terrified Cordelia is. So, she sets to work, bad knee and all, to fight for both her brother’s and Cordelia’s safety. Turns out, defeating a powerful sorceress isn’t as straightforward as anyone hoped.
My Review
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My Review 〰️
If I had to pick one word to describe this book, it would be: unsettling. And I mean that in the most satisfying way. This was a perfect read for right around Halloween because, while the physical horror is fairly minimal, the psychological horror had me getting out of bed to search behind my shower curtain for a lady casting spells.
We know right away that Evangeline is a villain. From the first page, there is a sense of wrongness between Cordelia and her mother than gets worse as the story progresses. The fact that there was no question as to who the villain was surprisingly worked for me. This is a retelling of a Grimm fairytale, after all, and I feel like having a set evildoer added to the whole fairytale vibe.
The story itself is appropriately ominous, and the writing is descriptive and impactful. But what really drew me in to the story were the characters. Namely, Hester. Give me a middle-aged ‘spinster’ with a bad knee and a wry sense of humor any damn day.
Cordelia’s relationship with her mother is heartbreaking, to say the least, and the way Kingfisher writes from the perspective of a young girl without much world experience is quite convincing. It made me enjoy the chapters written from Hester’s POV even more because they added some levity to what otherwise could have just been a tragic story. Her asides and attempts to thwart her brother’s relationship are hilarious. I love her obsession with breeding geese. I love how she interacts with her friends. And I especially love the relationship she was able to build with Cordelia while being fake AF to Evangeline.
Also, 10/10 for Willard (IYKYK)
Overall, I found this book to be an engrossing and straightforward, spooky read. The story itself was fine enough, but the real stand-outs are the characters and the slow trust they build with one another. I wouldn’t say any part of the plot surprised me (ghosts notwithstanding) but I still enjoyed just spending time in this world. More and more, we find ourselves needing storied that remind us evil can be fought, even if you’re a young naive girl or a woman ‘past her prime.’ This book does exactly that.
Overall Rating on my shelf: 4.25/5
Favorite Quotes
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Favorite Quotes 〰️
“It was the sort of damn, gray day enjoyed by ducks and frogs and very few humans. Occasionally the fog would solidify into rain, but it would quickly lose interest and go back to being fog again.”
“If all else fails, at least I’ll have someone to drink myself unconscious with when it all goes to hell.”
“Am I an old lady, then? Already? But I haven’t figured out how to age gracefully yet.”
“She was not a maiden in a tower, waiting for her faithful knight to save her. She was a grown woman, goddamnit, and even if an aged spinster was among the most socially powerless of creatures, she would not concede to Doom without a fight.”
The Workout
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The Workout 〰️
The Warmup (aka let’s open up our hips for…reasons)
1x Through
Squat Walkouts - 8
Side to Reverse Lunges - 5 per side
Shoulder CARS - 5 per side
Cross Crawls - 30 seconds
Supine Breathing - 40 seconds
Windshield Wipers - 5 per side
Open Books - 5 per side
Birddogs - 5 per side
Strength
Do one set of moves right after the other, then repeat the entire thing 3x
2-3 Getups per side (to get off the floor without hurting a knee)
10 Banded External Rotations per side(to absolutely SLAP some sense into the Squire)
5 Walking Lunges per side (again, we ride horsies)
6-8 Front Squats (aka lift up your Auntie and take her to a dang PT for her knee)
6-8 Supported Rows per side (GET PENELOPE, DAMNIT)
8 Single Leg Deadlifts per side (if we gonna ride a horsie,
we gonna do it right)
Cardio (trust me, we needa run)
Work in intervals with either sprints, rows, biking, or speed walking
Do this 10x through
10 seconds ALL OUT (you go as fast as you can, get your heart rate UP)
50 seconds active recovery (lighten the speed and bring your heart rate down)
Cooldown (always stretch dealing with an unhinged sorceress)
Piriformis Stretch - 10 reps
Supine Twists - 20 seconds per side
Supine Breathing - 30 seconds
Wall Angels - 10
Pigeon Stretch - 20 seconds per side
Hip Flexor Stretch - 20 seconds per side
